Introduction
The date was Monday, April 14, 2025. The setting was in the twilight zone of the federal government (“FedGov”), an eccentric world of twisted logic, bickering, showmanship, and bureaucratic ineptitude. The theme was late and last-minute FedGov timing.
Welcome to the 120th article in the humor topic section, dear reader. Let's poke a bit of fun at the FedGov! This journey into the FedGov twilight zone began on Monday evening. It continued into the next morning.
Tim Burchett's Telephone Town Hall
On that fateful Monday evening, my “long-suffering” wife and I had finished supper. Molly, our ten-year-old “puppy,” was on the couch in the living room. Sitting beside Molly, I was settling into watching a televised episode from an old western series. My wife was washing dishes.
In this neck of the woods, unless it is an emergency, common courtesy dictates that you do not call someone between 6 PM and 7 PM. That is the supper hour. At 6:35 PM, however, smack-dab in the middle of the supper hour, Tim Burchett, Tennessee's second-district representative in the United States House of Representatives, called our home phone.
Rushing into the living room, thinking that the call could be from a family member with a real emergency, my wife saw that the call from 865-432-2388 identified as Tim Burchett. The call was not an emergency.
Answering the call anyway, she quickly handed the phone to me. Molly was somewhat confused by the commotion. I wondered why Tim was calling me.
On the phone, I said, “Tim, I am here!” Tim kept on speaking, as if he didn't hear me. Aha! It was a recorded message from Tim Burchett! Our phone recorded Tim's recording. Once his recording ended, my call back to the same number, 865-432-2388, heard the same message repeated from Congressman Burchett.
The next morning, I transferred Tim's suppertime message from the phone to my desktop computer and saved it as an audiovisual clip without video, of course. The following 49-second clip is his remarks:
Later that next morning, I found and read "Rep. Burchett hosting town hall on April 14," Burchett.House.gov, Press Release, 4/7/2025, which states the following:
U.S. Congressman Tim Burchett (TN-02) will host a telephone town hall on Monday, April 14, at 6:30 p.m., with special guest Congressman Chip Roy (TX-21.)
The discussion will focus on legislative wins and other accomplishments in the first 100 days of the 119th Congress. Rep. Burchett will also take live questions from participants.
Telephone town halls provide an accessible and easy way for thousands of constituents to hear directly from the congressman and speak to him about their concerns.
Those who RSVP will receive a phone call on April 14 around 6:30 p.m. with an invitation to join the call. Anyone interested in participating can register at this link or visit www.burchett.house.gov. RSVP registration ends at 5 p.m. on Thursday, April 10.
To my knowledge, the press release, issued a week before the telephone town hall, was not picked up by any local media outlets, unless I missed it.
Did you catch the humor? The telephone town hall started on Monday evening at 6:30 PM. Congressman Burchett's recorded phone call came through at 6:35 PM.
Tim, you called five minutes too late! Additionally, couldn't you have started the telephone town hall at 7 PM, after the supper hour? Further, don't you know that common courtesy around here dictates that you don't call someone between 6 PM and 7 PM, unless it's an emergency? Finally, how did you get our home phone number?
Generally, I support Congressman Burchett's positions. I subscribe to and read his monthly newsletters. When I catch him in a televised news segment, local or national, I listen to what he has to say.
IRS Extends Tax Deadline for Tennessee Residents
Another point of FedGov humor on Monday, April 14, 2025, the penultimate day to file a federal tax return, was the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) decision to extend the federal income tax filing deadline for Tennessee residents to Monday, November 3!
If local media outlets carried the news on the 14th, I didn't catch it. Early the next morning, Tuesday, the 15th, federal income tax filing deadline day, I happened to hear the news while listening to a local news-talk radio station.
Later on the 15th, I found and read, “IRS: All of Tennessee qualifies for disaster tax relief; various deadlines postponed to Nov. 3.” Internal Revenue Service (IRS), News Release, 4/14/2025. The first two paragraphs state the following:
The Internal Revenue Service announced today tax relief for individuals and businesses in the entire state of Tennessee affected by severe storms, straight-line winds, tornadoes, and flooding that began on April 2, 2025.
These taxpayers now have until Nov. 3, 2025, to file various federal individual and business tax returns and make tax payments.
The news release further states that 2024 contributions to Individual Retirement Accounts (IRAs) are also extended to November 3.
Way to go, IRS! All those last-day filers and IRA contributors got a six-month-and-19-day extension. What about everyone who filed before or on the 14th? The IRS news release is silent. Those who filed before the 14th were simply out of luck. IRS, is this your way of saying that procrastination pays?
Mrs. Appalachian Irishman and I made 2024 IRA contributions on April 1st (Atheists' Day). We mailed in our 2024 federal income tax return, paying a nominal amount, on April 14th. We joined countless thousands of Tennesseans who were out of luck.
IRS, do not procrastinate future news releases about tax deadline extensions to the penultimate day before the filing deadline! Severe storms hit Tennessee beginning on April 2. The next day, the president signed an emergency declaration for the state. You could have released news about the filing extension for the state on Friday, the 4th.
Conclusion
The 4/9/2025 article was about the new roof on our house on April 2, the president's self-proclaimed “liberation day.” Thankfully, this area received only light to moderate rain on Sunday, April 6, from the storms that began to hit western areas of Tennessee four days earlier.
On Monday, April 14, Congressman Burchett's suppertime call was five minutes late. That same day's IRS news release was at most ten days late. That's FedGov timing for you. Procrastinators do not need to make excuses for procrastinating. The FedGov is their example!
My sarcastic wit finds humor in this. Does yours?
Please remember that tomorrow is celebrated as Good Friday. Resurrection Sunday is coming!